Cobras I Wish Would Appear In The Movie

He's not in the movie, is he? If he is that would be so stupid cool.

The Marvel run of the Joe comic had all these crazy ass characters that appeared for only one or two issues. Maybe Hasbro had a new action figure out and wanted Larry Hama to promote it. Still, an accountant dressed up as a falcon would so make me want to watch the movie.

What, There's A Difference??

Yeah, Gung-Ho. At least get the species right. That's a croc, not a 'gator chewing on Stalker's thigh.

Anyone else think that Stalker is not a bad-ass?


From G.I. Joe #13 (Marvel, 1983), by Larry Hama, Mike Vosburg & Joe D'agostino

Different Sizes Of My Dicks

I don't mind the larger size (bigger panels after all) but they couldn't do this from the first book??? I mean look at that! My 'Dick Tracy' shelf looks all wonky now with the different size volumes.

Phoning It In...

Wolverine and Shang-Chi, Master of Kung Fu, doing that Zen thing in a monastery somewhere in Madripoor. Yeah, I got nothing.

Then There Was The Time Mark Waid Got 'Kidnapped' By A Couple Of Fanboys

The following story was totally cribbed from this week's Cup O' Joe at Comic Book Resources. Yeah, I'm cutting and pasting entire posts now. Roll with it. Anyway, it's a funny story, in a creepy, "I'm gonna make you squeal like a pig" kind of way.

Mark Waid:
Several years ago, I had done an over-the-phone college radio interview with a couple of guys in Vermont. Chat went fine, I remembered to mention what a genius Alex Ross is the requisite nine times, and we probably moved some trade paperbacks in the process. So once the interview was done, one of them explained that they ran a store in one of Vermont’s largish towns and asked if I’d be interested in doing an in-person signing. “Sure,” I said. At the time, I was living in Brooklyn, so it would be a short flight, and I’d never been to Vermont before. Fly up late on a Saturday morning, home on Sunday morning, see the sights, meet some fans. “Great,” I said. Set me up.”

The flight--on one of those twin-engine jobs where they discount your ticket if you bring your own helmet--was, despite the tiny cabin, spectacular. Honestly. There wasn’t a cloud in the sky at any point during the trip, and I just stared out the window at the beautiful farmland below. Landed around noon. My hosts were there to pick me up. They were a little younger than I’d figured they were going to be, but at least they were there at the gate like they’d promised they’d be and, besides, I’ve never been very good at picking up on Giant Red Flags.

So they piled me into their 1932 Hupmobile and, though we didn’t have a whole lot of time before the signing was scheduled to begin, they decided they wanted to give me a tour of the city. “Here’s the college,” they remarked as we drove past.

“Cool. Store’s probably nearby, right? Where’s the store?”

“And here’s the business district. This is the downtown area. And over here is restaurant row.”

“Nice. Very pretty. Very picturesque. So where’s the store?”

“Now, down here is the old mill. Been closed for a while, but it’s still a big tourist draw.”

“That is something. Yes, sir. So where’s the store?”

“Well, Mr. Waid...about that...”

There was no store.

Let me repeat that.

There was no store.

There. Was. No. Store. Instead, there were, in this town, two comics fans who had pooled their lawnmowing money to pay for a LaGuardia-to-Vermont plane ticket for their very-soon-not-to-be-favorite writer so they could meet him and own him for a day.

There. Was. No. Store.

I’ve seen the movie Misery. I’m ahead of you. I’ve told this story often enough that I know exactly what your response to that is. You want to know how quickly I reached from the back seat of the Hupmobile, snapped their necks, and took the first plane back to New York. That is a perfectly reasonable thing to wonder, but you have the dual benefits of hindsight and perspective. I had neither. For me that afternoon, it was just such a surreal, slow-dawn unfolding of the bizarre that the indignant neck-snapper in me was internally at war with my analytical-writer side, and I was forced to fully assess the situation rather than follow my murderous instincts. The arguments against Hulking out were compelling. First, I was completely dependent on these guys for transportation, and we were so far from the airport that finding, much less paying for, a taxicab was out of the question. Second, I already knew for a fact that there were no more flights back to New York that day. Third, this was long before I had a cellphone in my pocket at all times so, on the off-chance the cops would be able to fingerprint these guys’ necks before I could hitchhike over the state line, I had no easy way of letting my friends and family know whatever became of me. And...and, I admit, this was the single most pertinent factor...the morbidly curious part of me, the part that loves a good story, was dying to know what was going to happen next.

Here’s what happened next: Nothing.

I don’t mean, like, nothing bad. I mean, like, nothing. We drove around some more. I answered a lot of questions about what Alan Moore and Paul Levitz were really like. I signed a few of their comics, I lied about being hungry and made them change our dinner reservation from 7:30 to 5:00, I met their nineteen fanboy pals at the restaurant, I inhaled my food, and I was finally alone at the Sav-On-Inn by six.

There was no cable TV. I spent most of the next several hours watching fishing shows.

The next morning, they and all nineteen of their friends--each and every one of them holding in his trembling hands a mini-series proposal for the resurrection of some obscure DC character no one will ever, ever, ever care about--swung the Hupmobile by to grab me for breakfast before the flight home. I begged off on the meal, asked politely but firmly that they simply get me to the airport, and then, once I was there, where there were plenty of Federal marshals around to keep any of us from doing anything regretful, I politely read these guys the riot act. I explained how so very uncool this was, how it was flattering and their hearts were in the right place but how freakish this whole experience had been, and that before I would ever even consider referring any other comics pro to them, comic books would no longer exist. They got it. I saw in their sad, puppy-dog eyes that they got it. There was no question that they got it.

Six months later, another pro called me for info. He remembered that I’d been invited to Vermont and he was interested in taking a trip there if they’d fly him in. He’d tried calling ahead, but for some reason, directory assistance didn’t have any comics stores listed in the area.

Go figure.

Tiny Titans Darkseid Is So Cute...

From tiny titans: Adventures in Awesomeness trade collection. A book that makes me squee with delight every time I read it. Which is often.

Hey, Look! A New Post!

Well, it's been like what, two weeks since I last updated this blog? Sometimes real world responsibilities set up an ambush for you and you have no choice but to take care of it and leave everything else (like a blog about comic books). Anyway, I'm back and let's hope I won't go away for long after this, huh?

So what's this? John Stewart and the Martian Manhunter arrive at the planet Xanshi. They were assigned to Xanshi by the Highfather and Darkseid to destroy the Anti-Life Aspect before it destroys the planet and put the Milky Way galaxy in peril.



So off the Lantern goes without his Martian partner because he's ring is all-powerful and all that...


Whoops...
The thing they were sent there to destroy is in freakin' yellow, the one colour a Green Lantern's ring cannot fight against (pre-Green Lantern: Rebirth) and John Stewart just left his all powerful Martian friend a few thousand kilometres behind him. This will not look good on his resume, that's for sure. But wait...


Who the heck is this guy? Seriously, who is he? Look at the first panel up there. The locals have a distinctive look. This guy looks like Jerry Garcia. Is that how writer Jim Starlin looks like? It just took me out of the story for a second. It's like seeing a Charlton Heston cameo in a silly comedy or something.

20 years ago, a Cosmic Odyssey threatened to destroy the galaxy. Jim Starlin and Mike Mignola were there to chronicle it. The collection is still available online or you can wait till September and get the new edition. Probably nothing new other than a new foreword maybe.

Friday Night Fights: G7 Fight Music round 3

I'm A Dinosaurus Roar, Roar, Hey everybody, I'm A Dinosaur ~ Former Fat Boys

Devil Dinosaur shows everyone why he's top lizard in Devil Dinosaur Omnibus by Jack Kirby

Shut Up, Paco!

Yeah, Vibe, because your shockwave abilities are oh, so cool.

I have an irrational dislike for Paco Ramone a.k.a Vibe, can you tell?

B'wana Beast: Alpha Male

There are two reasons why I love Grant Morrison. First, he brought back crazy stories into the pages of superhero comics when he took over Doom Patrol when everyone else was going for grim and gritty. The other is when he saved B'wana Beast from obscurity and reintroduced him to a new generation of comic fans in the pages of Animal Man. Because that made the writers of the Justice League Unlimited cartoon show remember B'wana Beast as well and that, in turn, prompted Adam Beechen to feature B'wana in an issue of the Justice League Unlimited comic.

That's why I love Grant Morrison.

Anyway, in issue #29 of the JLU comic, the League is up against mind controlled gorillas in Seattle and they're actually having trouble subduing the apes. Mainly because there's no help from B'wana Beast. He's off doing his "Lord of the Jungle" thing, much to Superman's chagrin.


B'wana's such a jerk...but I love him, the big lug.

Superman then asks Animal Man to go talk to B'wana Beast seeing as how they both have animal-related powers. B'wana ain't interested, baby.

B'wana Beast gives help to no one, whelp!

So then the League receives an emergency call from Mexico City. Queen Bee is holding the entire city ransom. Lots of money or she'll sic her mutated killer bees on the populace. Not nice. The League goes to work. Superman orders Animal Man and B'wana Beast to try and channel abilities of natural bee predators like wasps or bears but B'wana Beast ignores him because:

Yeah. He's off doing his own thing again until, that is, when Animal Man gets into trouble





So BB isn't such a jerk after all.

Awwww.....

I love the all-ages superhero comics. Justice League Unlimited, Tiny Titans, DC Superfriends, Batman: Brave and the Bold, Marvel Adventures. They're not pretentious and they tell their story in one issue. Plus, I can share them with my kids. This story is collected in Justice League Unlimited: Heroes and was written by Adam Beechen with art by Carlo Barberi and Tom Fowler.

Batman Has Eggnog With The Kents

Awkwaaaard. And does Clark have boobs in the background there?


From Justice League Unlimited: Heroes by McAvennie, Greene & Massengill

Friday Night Fights: G7 Fight Music round 2

This time round, Spacebooger insists that all fights must relate to a song, lyric from a song or music in general. He doesn't believe in taking it easy, the Booger. So here's my entry: a giant sized man beating the heck out of a reptilian monster in briefs.

He did the mash
He did the monster mash
The monster mash

It was a graveyard smash
He did the mash
It caught on in a flash
He did the mash
He did the monster mash

Chorus from Bobby "Boris" Pickett's Monster Mash. Panels from Marvel Monsters hardcover collection. Written by Steve Niles, art by Duncan Fegredo

Out Of Context Sunday...erm, no, Thursday.

There's a hot looking woman chained in this guy's bomb shelter, wearing high-heeled boots and practically nothing else and he wants to know if she's a vampire???

I think he's gay.

Yes, I went there.

From Vampirella: Crimson Chronicles Maximum collection from Harris Comics. Story by Archie Goodwin, artwork by Jose Gonzalez.

Great Moment In Comics History No. 8: Holy Crap, Kal-El!

Not really that far back to be considered 'history' but check this out:


Jay Garrick gets struck by lightning and what does Superman from Earth-22 do? He jumps in and punches away the lightning bolt!!

That is hardcore.

From Justice Society of America: Thy Kingdom Come, Part Three by Johns, Ross, Eaglesham and Pasarin (DC, 2009)

I'm Outta Here!

No, I'm not closing down this blog. Was that a groan I hear? Yeah? Well screw you! No, the mid-term school holidays are coming up here in Malaysia so I'm taking the family on our annual vacation trip. This year we're planning to travel to the northern Malaysian state of Trengganu. There will be no emails, no fax and no handphones. I don't care what happens to the outside world. I'm taking a break. I'll be back in a week or so. Maybe I'll write something about the holiday. Who knows, I might see something interesting/weird/scary. So adios, ciao, see ya. I will have to miss the opening Friday Night Fight at Spacebooger.com but family's first, man.

In the meantime, here's 'spiky' Ben Grimm:



Sorry, man. You're too late. I am sooooo outta here. Go ask the Beyonder or somebody else.