Friday Night Fights: O.P.P (1)

In case you can't see the words, the Super Skrull said, "For the love of Kolker! Is there no one on this planet who's normal anymore?"

To which the correct reply would be, "HELL, NO!" but a SPROOOING uppercut is even better.

Spacebooger knows what I'm talking about.

From The Incredible Hulk #375 by Peter David, Dale Keown & Bob McLeod.

The Incredible Hulk....

hates getting wet


Hulk receives an impromptu shower in HULK Annual 7 (1978) by Stern, Byrne & Layton, collected in Giant-Size Hulk (2008)

Friday Night Fights: KA-POW!! round 1

It begins again. Only this time, Friday Night Fights has a new home. Bahlactus has left so all ass kicking will take place at Spacebooger's place.

DGR's contender: The Incredible Hulk. He KWOMS that sucka Marvel so bad, boy actually yelps like the dirty dog that he is!

From Incredible Hulk #246 or the Heart of the Atom HC collection, whichever you prefer. Bill Mantlo & Sal Buscema, the talents.

Hulk: Heart of the Atom HC (Marvel, 2008)

Remember the time when Greg Pak wrote that cool storyline where Hulk was blasted off into space by Iron Man and Reed Richards because they didn't want him to go rampaging all across the Midwest ever again but unfortunately the shuttle the Hulk was in veered off course and landed on an inhabited planet with warring factions and he quickly became the leader of the losing side and kicked the butt of the ruling class, appointed as the new ruler, fell in love, got married and then lost everything to a bomb because one of his new friends betrayed him? Yeah, Heart of the Atom is actually nothing like that.

It shares some similarities, though, but instead of outer space the Hulk travels down to microscopic level where he discovers the existence of a medieval-like civilization. The inhabitants embrace him after he shoos away some rampaging creatures that look like wild boars from destroying their castle. Plus, they also have green skin so they immediately accept Hulk as their own. If Spider-Man had saved them instead of the Hulk, they would probably shoot their arrows at him. Bastards! Anyway...

Hulk is brought to Jarella, Empress of this microscopic world, who orders her three sorcerers (two of whom are called Holi and Moli, I kid you not) to make the Hulk understand their language so that they can communicate. Not only did the magic spell work it also resulted in the Hulk having Bruce Banner's intelligence as well. One quick marriage with Jarella and the defeat of a jealous would-be usurper later, the Hulk is happy in his new role as King but this being Hulk, happy things don't stay too long. He is soon snatched back into the regular-sized world leaving behind a distraught bride who has no idea why her new husband grew to ginormous size.

Hulk visited the micro world a few more times over the years but it would end the same every time: something would compel him to leave his wife and her sub-atomic world. Things get really interesting when Jarella is transported back to Earth along with Hulk and she ends up getting killed. No, that's not a spoiler. You know things won't end well with her the moment she set eyes on Hulk. It's a given. It is also when Sal Buscema took over pencilling chores and I like his rendition of Hulk with the ever gaping mouth and spittle. Sal Buscema's Hulk never, ever looks dumb. He's just very angry and that's the way I like it.

Heart of the Atom collects all the relevant issues (11 in all) plus What If? #23 which asked what if Jarella hadn't died. All in all, it's a good collection on an often forgotten part of the Hulk mythos. No doubt it would claim credit for inspiring Greg Pak's Planet Hulk story (heck, the inside cover flap of the book practically said so) but there's nothing wrong with that. When you have been telling stories of the same character practically non-stop for the past 40 years it's kinda hard to come up with something new and fresh. Just read the back issues for ideas and try to cater it to the modern audience. Every writer does that. If you've read Planet Hulk and thought it was great, read Heart of the Atom. Greg Pak obviously did.

Oh, by the way, the cover above is the cover of one of the issues collected within and not the cover of the collection itself. The hardcover has dark green lettering on a black background and it didn't scan well. At least not on my cheap scanner.

Hulk: World War Hulk (Marvel, 2008)

What is it: All five issues of the World War Hulk limited series collected in one book.

What is it about?: Hulk returns to Earth and inflicts grievous bodily harm to a lot of Marvel superheroes especially those whom he blames for his forced exile, namely Mr. Fantastic, Black Bolt, Dr. Strange and Iron Man.

Is it any good?: Tastes vary, obviously. Plus, you need to know what the hell Hulk's angry about. Go read the excellent Planet Hulk first. But if you expect nothing from your superhero comics other than mindless face punching and ass kicking then this book was written for you! Plus, if you sided with Captain America's team during Marvel's Civil War then WWH is your wet dream come true. Sure, nothing changes in the end (c'mon, that's a given) but the side that won during the Civil War gets Hulk-smashed so bad that it has to be a reader with no emotions at all who would not shout, "Who's the bitch now, Tony? Huh?" while reading WWH.

Newbie friendly?: I'm gonna go with "NO". This is the main problem with crossovers from Marvel and DC but that's for another thread. If you want to enjoy World War Hulk, I'd recommend reading the aforementioned Planet Hulk first. Also Civil War, but only if you have money to burn and/or a masochist.

But I can't afford Planet Hulk and the rest. Can't you give me a brief recap here instead?: Oh, all right. You see, it turns out that Black Bolt, Iron Man, Dr. Strange and Mr. Fantastic all agreed that the Hulk is a menace and for his and Earth's own good they decided that Hulk should be shot into space. So they tricked Hulk into entering a shuttle and blasted him off the planet. He subsequently landed on the planet Sakaar where he was enslaved, escaped, became a resistance leader and finally became king. He made friends and even had a wife. Made her pregnant too. But the shuttle that brought him to Sakaar exploded and bye-bye pregnant wife (and about a million other inhabitants). Hulk mad. When Hulk mad, Hulk smash. Hulk and friends board new shuttle and fly to Earth.

Who are the talents?: Greg Pak wrote it. He also wrote the Planet Hulk storyline so the whole damn show was his baby. John Romita Jr. handled the pencils with Klaus Janson inking. I'm not a huge fan of JRjr (I don't hate his style, just not a big fan) but he's perfect here. His pencils suit a dark story which World War Hulk surely is.

Anything good came out of this series?: Yes. The Incredible Hulk comic was re-titled Incredible Hercules (but the numbering was not reset to #1). When they heard that, fanboys went "Whu?" as per usual and rolled their eyes even before reading the darn thing. And when they did, they found it to be good. I'll probably review the Herc' book soon.

Ladies & Gentlemen, The Incredible Hulk!

Because sometimes you just need to see the Hulk break Bambi's neck.

Hulk #2

So in this issue, the crimson-tinted Hulk has to....aww, who gives a damn? They lost me at Jeph Loeb.

Monkey Pokes Hulk, Hulk Smash!

Still no reviews today, sorry. It's not that I don't have trades to write about. Far from it. It's just that stuff happens at work and life in general that by the end of the day, I couldn't be bothered to stare at the computer (again) and write about a comic trade I just read. Reviews soon, I promise.

In the meantime, here's a page from Marvel Adventures Hulk #7 by Paul Benjamin and David Nakayama. I've mentioned before why I like the Marvel Adventures line and this issue doesn't disappoint. The MA comics are the only Marvel comics worth reading nowadays...oh, except for Immortal Iron Fist and Runaways and uhm...X-Men First Class.



The monkey! The monkey did it! Hurt the monkey!

I Know How She Feels....

...because the state MARVEL books are right now, they almost drive me to the bottle as well. Good thing they have the Marvel Adventures line. Oh, and X-Men First Class and erm...Runaways.

The Incredible Hulk #359 (Marvel Comics, 1989)

Incredible Hulk #359, collected in volume 4 Visionaries - Peter David: The Incredible Hulk, has the Hulk play dice against the Devil and win. I would have preferred to see him lose which means Hulk would end up in Hell and that would have been one hell of an adventure to read. Yes, that pun was intended. Yes, I know it's bad. All puns are bad, dontcha know?

Hulk has just been fired from his job as an enforcer in Las Vegas when Glorian, a gold skinned dude who travels on a rainbow confronts him.

In any other town, when you see a golden boy with a rainbow running around main street, you would probably stop what you were doing, stare for a minute, call up your friends and family and point. Maybe take a photo. In Vegas, you can't be too sure. He could be the mayor. Anyway, Glorian the golden boy needs Hulk to help him fulfill a contract. Apparently, Glorian made a deal with a Mister Cloot that he would turn the Hulk into a peace loving hippie by midnight or he loses his soul to the Cloot. Silly boy, this Glorian. You never stake your soul on anything especially to someone with the name like Cloot. The name sounds like something you hear in the toilet. "Cloot, cloot, cloot". Erm...yeeahh.

But Hulk won't play. Turn Hulk into a noble, self-sacrificing dude? You nuts? This is the Gray Hulk. He wants money, babes and power. Oh, and to kill Banner the wimp. Not for him is the life of a Samaritan. Gray Hulk is not a bleeding heart liberal. Gray Hulk is a neocon Republican.

But then Mr. Cloot reveals himself to be the Devil himself and he wants both Glorian and Hulk's souls to come keep him company. Okay, now Hulks wanna play.

Devil gives Hulk super-sized dice to roll with. Everything has to be big with the Devil, hasn't it? You think he's compensating for something?



I like that. Hulk stomps the ground to get the dice to roll the way he wants it. The Devil accuses him of cheating. Right. The Devil. Accusing someone else of cheating.

The Shaper of Worlds chooses that moment to come in and stop the Devil from reneging on the deal. The Shaper is Glorian's master or something like that and he's quite upset at Glorian. Making deals with shady people, staking his soul, wrapping Hulk in a rainbow. That's just wrong, so Shaper takes Glorian away to be spanked. Cloot/Devil goes back to Hell and Hulk is left alone thinking what the hell just happened.

Yes, that pun was also intended.