G.I. JOE SPECIAL MISSIONS #22

Day Three of G.I. JOE: A REAL AMERICAN HERO week and today we're gonna take a look at issue 22 of the Joes spin-off book, G.I. JOE SPECIAL MISSIONS. (Day 1 is here, Day 2 is here)

The "Special Missions" series focused less on COBRA and more on terrorists-of-the-month type of stories. The scenarios are much more real-world stuff than what was featured in the main G.I JOE book. Maybe that's why it was cancelled after only 28 issues. Yet another book I liked that ended prematurely. Oh well....

In this issue, a trio of terrorists have taken a nice family hostage. We only see two of them here. The third terrorist (that's him on the cover) is upstairs terrorising the kid.

Creepy looking fellow, isn't he, this Laszlo? All the while, the Joes assigned to this hostage rescue are outside staking out the house in a van. (as usual, left-click and drag mouse to enlarge pictures. Click, damn you, click!)


From left to right: Lady Jaye, Hit & Run and Shockwave. With Chuckles driving the van casually.

Back at the rendezvous point, we get some much needed exposition from Saxon, the F.B.I. man:




Damn, those baddies are cold hearted. Go get 'em, Joes! No mercy! Cobra-Kai! Sweep the leg! Yes, Sensei!


So everyone gets into position - Shockwave:


Hit & Run:


He's so excited, he's making motor boat noises. Lady Jaye gets to go point and pretends to be a makeup salesperson from "Afton".



Meanwhile, we get one big clue here from a neighbour, just to heighten the tension:



A RICTUS, Agent Saxon! Look it up!



Okay, I'm not gonna insult your intelligence. You know something's fishy here, right?

And you'd be right. Smiling Mary is one of the terrorists! They knew they were being watched so they forced the real occupants to behave like the bad guys while they sit down and look worried and blonde. Hey, waitaminute....that means creepy looking guy is....

Shockwave moves in and shoots dead the terrorist who's guarding the nice couple's son:


Chuckles joins in as well:



In the boy's room, Shockwave makes a startling discovery:


Rictus? That photo? The creepy looking guy is actually the hostage? Aww, shit!


Aww, shit part II: Hitting the fan.



Fortunately, Hit & Run makes the right choice and shoots the nice looking guy instead (I call him "Joseph"). But his blonde girlfriend, Mary, attempts to escape with the kid in tow. But is she in for a big surprise:



Rictus guy Laszlo was a sniper instructor for the Marines! Of all the houses, Mary, you picked the one with a sharpshooter in it. She gets a facelift and the Bronsky's nightmare is over. Yo, Joe! The twist in this story makes it one of my favourite G.I. Joe Special Missions issue. There's a moral here, kids: Just because someone looks like the Joker's poor cousin doesn't mean he can't pull some cool shit....like blowing off the face of a beautiful yet completely psychotic blonde terrorist.