16 August 2007

The Incredible Hulk #359 (Marvel Comics, 1989)

Incredible Hulk #359, collected in volume 4 Visionaries - Peter David: The Incredible Hulk, has the Hulk play dice against the Devil and win. I would have preferred to see him lose which means Hulk would end up in Hell and that would have been one hell of an adventure to read. Yes, that pun was intended. Yes, I know it's bad. All puns are bad, dontcha know?

Hulk has just been fired from his job as an enforcer in Las Vegas when Glorian, a gold skinned dude who travels on a rainbow confronts him.

In any other town, when you see a golden boy with a rainbow running around main street, you would probably stop what you were doing, stare for a minute, call up your friends and family and point. Maybe take a photo. In Vegas, you can't be too sure. He could be the mayor. Anyway, Glorian the golden boy needs Hulk to help him fulfill a contract. Apparently, Glorian made a deal with a Mister Cloot that he would turn the Hulk into a peace loving hippie by midnight or he loses his soul to the Cloot. Silly boy, this Glorian. You never stake your soul on anything especially to someone with the name like Cloot. The name sounds like something you hear in the toilet. "Cloot, cloot, cloot". Erm...yeeahh.

But Hulk won't play. Turn Hulk into a noble, self-sacrificing dude? You nuts? This is the Gray Hulk. He wants money, babes and power. Oh, and to kill Banner the wimp. Not for him is the life of a Samaritan. Gray Hulk is not a bleeding heart liberal. Gray Hulk is a neocon Republican.

But then Mr. Cloot reveals himself to be the Devil himself and he wants both Glorian and Hulk's souls to come keep him company. Okay, now Hulks wanna play.

Devil gives Hulk super-sized dice to roll with. Everything has to be big with the Devil, hasn't it? You think he's compensating for something?

I like that. Hulk stomps the ground to get the dice to roll the way he wants it. The Devil accuses him of cheating. Right. The Devil. Accusing someone else of cheating.

The Shaper of Worlds chooses that moment to come in and stop the Devil from reneging on the deal. The Shaper is Glorian's master or something like that and he's quite upset at Glorian. Making deals with shady people, staking his soul, wrapping Hulk in a rainbow. That's just wrong, so Shaper takes Glorian away to be spanked. Cloot/Devil goes back to Hell and Hulk is left alone thinking what the hell just happened.

Yes, that pun was also intended.

No comments: